New year, new hopes, new goals, still no resolutions; I just don’t get on with them, there’s not enough freedom for things to change which naturally happens with life – especially one with chronic illnesses!
Instead of resolutions which get me stressing out, I sit down and think about what I hope will happen and put these into two categories. It’s very simple: those that have good chances of happening are classed as “goals”, those that are more iffy are classed as hopes.
This helps my mind have flexibility so, if something happens or changes, I can just put it down as something I wasn’t able to do – whereas if I don’t achieve my resolutions, I feel as if I failed which goes directly against it being something positive for my mental health.
By doing this, I get motivated and feel good when I manage to achieve them without the negative feelings when something doesn’t come to fruition.
Goals
Goals are like a satnav, they might take you to some odd places before you get there but they guide you to a destination.
Tig Ellis
Meet Chloe in person
My girlfriend, Chloe, lives in America so my biggest hope and goal for this year is to hold her in my arms like I dream of doing every single night.
Status: [to be updated at the time]
Legally change my name
I live my everyday as Tig Ellis but because my deadname is still my government name, I am called that in certain places and I just want to be me.
Status: [to be updated at the time]
Keep finding me and who I am
It may hurt, it may cut as if bladed, it may drag things up so overwhelming it sometimes feels like I’m drowning but it’s healing and it’s the beginning of a future that will be good too.
Status: [to be updated at the time]
Finish my first module
I’m someone that will pick myself back up after falling, it’s embedded into my soul by this stage. They say “third time’s lucky”, so with a different first module, onwards we go.
Status: [to be updated at the time]
Hopes
Hope is a firefly in all weather, sunny or stormy. You get so used to it being there that you no longer notice it but then it flickers to catch your attention and, my gosh, is it beautiful.
Tig Ellis
Being kinder to myself
I spend a lot of time, far too much time, being so utterly critical of myself and anything that might be classed as a failure. I’m so tired of it and I’m determined to work on it this year.
Status: [to be updated at the time]
Start selling my crafts
So many have said “you should sell these” over the past few years and, even though my self-esteem is low, I want this year to be the one where I “fake it til I make it”… maybe?!
Status: [to be updated at the time]
Write for an outside source
It’s been my dream to be published somewhere else too but I’ve never really had the confidence so I never put myself forward but it’s my “fake it til you make it” year!
Status: [to be updated at the time]
Just put myself out there more
If I see an opportunity that I can and want to do, I hope I’ll do it. No, I’ll never be able to do as much as a healthy person but I want to do as much as I can do.
Status: [to be updated at the time]
As it’s my first blog post of the year, I just want to quickly wish you all a very happy new year! I’m already aware that my year’s going to be hard but I think it’ll be a good one! Hopefully 2024 will treat you with kindness too.
What are your goals and hopes for the year?
Lots of Love,
& Big Gentle Hugs,
Tig x
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