As I’ve mentioned before, I don’t get on with resolutions. They stress me out, and I don’t feel like they give enough freedom for life changes, something that chronic illnesses tend to amplify to extreme levels.
Still, I like writing down my goals and hopes for the upcoming year and assessing them at the end. How I categorise them to keep them flexible yet motivating and rewarding to achieve is:
Goals: the ones I feel have a good chance of happening.
Hopes: the ones that have a chance of happening are iffier.
Whilst it may seem “silly” to others, it’s what works for me and has done for years now. I didn’t manage to assess my 2024 ones last month, so I’ve rolled them into one post and bullet-pointed my 2025 ones!
Goals
Goals can be scored, taken, and missed by football players, and they’re no different from life goals; only they are bigger pieces of our lives’ puzzle.
Tig Ellis
Meet Chloe in person
Brutally honest, this never happened and will never happen. We had quite a sour breakup, but one that left me feeling proud of myself for sticking up for myself.
I realised that if they love you, they will make time for you, and that’s not too big of an ask to make. You won’t be an option but a conscious priority and hopefully, one day, I’ll find that.
For now, though, I’m prioritising myself and my healing. Quite frankly, I and those around me who genuinely care deserve that, and whoever may come into my life does, too.
Legally change my name
Although it’s still high on my priority list, 2024 had other ideas. I quickly found that it was a year I had to fight the currents and get through.
Amongst my own series of issues, my Mum had her Ischemic Stroke in April, and I needed to put my oxygen mask on before helping to put hers on. So, this took a backseat.
I live as Tig Ellis day-to-day, and I’m very dissociated from my deadname. I still want to be recognised and known by everyone as Tig Ellis. It’s who I am, and I deserve to be. It will be a 2025 goal, but it helped in a sink or doggy paddle year.
Keep finding me and who I am
Ironically enough, whilst it’s the only goal on my list I did achieve, it was the one I felt most anxious about. I have a memory like Dory’s and can’t remember why, though.
If I’m to guess, it’s likely because it’s a new thing where I let myself be me and find who I am. It’s scary as you think: I’m so proud of myself for getting to this point; what if I slip?
But one thing I knew was key to sticking with and focusing on was this. Ultimately, I think that fear helped me massively realise how important it was to my mental healing.
If I hadn’t, I may not have considered it a priority when this year became priority-based. However, as it stood out as a concern about losing it, it was clear to me that it was high on my priority list.
Finish my first module
I got to the stage where my newest attempt at university was once again making me ill, and my lovely Mum and sister Rhianna – who I live with – practically threw an intervention.
They had noticed I was no longer doing it for the right reasons but to prove to everyone that I could. It had become a sense that I was a failure if I didn’t do university. And, when they said it, it suddenly became clear to me, too.
Our worth doesn’t depend on qualifications, job titles, salaries, or what we have. It’s whether you’ve got a good heart or not. I knew that for everyone else but when it came to me, I had to let go of holding myself to invalid standards.
Hopes
A life without hope is like Earth without a Sun. With its light gone, how can we possibly see the way?
Tig Ellis
Being kinder to myself
I won’t lie, it’s continued to be a constant battle added to by outside sources I won’t name. I’ve always struggled with affording myself kindness and compassion instead of usually being my own biggest bully.
But the best part of two decades of my brain building these self-beliefs and habits of these spirals aren’t going to disappear in four months. Therefore, it’s been hard, and I’m going to have to continue with it, but I’m still proud of how far I’ve come.
Start selling my crafts
I have achieved this, but I want to go into 2025 with the goal of making it accessible to all of you. I want to create a place on this website, or maybe using Etsy, where I sell my weaves, loom knits, and poems as cards or posters.
It will likely be more towards the end of the year, but I want to work towards it until then. I want to make it something I can proudly say, ‘Look at my name there, that’s mine!’ and something you all will (hopefully) like.
Write for an outside source
I am beyond proud to say that I did this and that I was a writer in a wonderful analogy that will hopefully go on to help many. It was the first time I’ve been paid for my writing, and I honestly wasn’t expecting to be going into it, but it’s helped me see my worth better.
It’s made me feel much more confident in my writing and the worth of my words. I have things to say that are worth listening to, and when I struggle to believe that, I go back to the credits that have my name and just smile.
You can listen to Infinite World of Vision here. It’s about different life transitions and aims to help young individuals with sight impairments. I’ve spoken about wanting it to exist for a long time, and I’m beyond proud to be a part of it.
Just put myself out there more
Looking back, I think I meant this in so many ways. I wanted my writing out there, my name better known, and I guess you could say that with the book. Even though it’s not how I saw it coming, and although the book has so far been a drop in the ocean, I’m proud of it.
Meanwhile, when it comes to my accessibility work, I wasn’t too successful with all my life’s events. Besides this, I met some fantastic friends online who helped me to sew up my long, broken heart.
I even met an incredible person who has been there for me this past year through some horrendous times. They’ve become my best friend and rock. So I’d say I achieved this and am proud of that.
2025 goals and hopes
As I’ve spoken about several of my goals and hopes, and this is getting rather long, I’ll just bullet point my hopes and goals for this year.
- Goal: legally change my name.
- Hope: write for more outside sources.
- Goal: keep finding myself.
- Hope: become consistent on my blog.
- Goal: continue being kinder to myself.
- Hope: start selling my crafts here.
- Goal: keep putting myself out there.
- Hope: start listening more to me.
What are your 2025 hopes and goals and did you meet your ones for 2024? I’d love to know!
Lots Of Love,
& Big Gentle Hugs,
Tig x
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Tig Ellis - The Zebra With Rainbow Stripes 